On the road - again

A two and a half hour training/endurance ride. I should be home with my feet up by the fire place where it's warm. Instead, I'm out here pushing my Mountain bike along this damn gravel road. It didn't seem so bad at first, the ride is fairly easy. My first "hill" is easy so I use a lower gear and chalk that time up to "easy spinning". After 20 minutes into my ride, I really wish I had something better to do. Finally, I reach the first bit of paved road, a nice long downhill ride where I can rest a bit and make up some time.
By the time I reach the one hour mark I need to turn around and head back home. I really wanted to go at least another 7 km but it wasn't to be on this trip. It seemed that going home I had the wind at my back so things were a little easier - just.
As I got back on the paved road, I realised that the long down-hill was now a long uphill. Half way up I was struggling. My arse was so sore I couldn't sit. It felt like I had been in a Turkish prison and was butt-raped everyday. Well, that's what I imagined anyway. I was standing, dancing on the pedals, and I was managing about 12 km/h. The sweat was pouring into my eyes. It burned, and as I blinked more ran in and my vision became blurred. I had thought about riding with my eyes closed but staying on the road would have been problematic.
I continued on. The birds seemed to be laughing at me now and my glasses were crusty with salt from the sweat. I had nothing to wipe my eyes with and on I pedaled. The pros would have flew past me, but I was slowly getting there.
Finally, I was at the top and turned back on to the last gravel road home. I had only one long, gentle hill to go. 4 kilometres in fact. Gravel roads can be slow, and this road was VERY slow. It had been recently graded and the stones were loose making pedaling a hard slog. My butt was very sore now, and while I don't normally like to stand, it was a big improvement on sitting.
I completed my ride in two hours and ten minutes and rode a total of 37 km. The shower never felt so good as it did today.
But the sweat, it really burns...